Quarter Life Musings

I wrote this earlier this afternoon while I was in the office, idling away into a void. There are days like such at work. Oh, but that's a day in my life lately. The amount of work spikes and dips like crazy, which solely depends on the demands of my boss. Not that he demands in-a-bad-way-demands for things to be done, he's a nice boss! *buyaaag, knocks on wood*

Anyway, it's the eve of my 21st birthday, and for the first time in weeks, I shall post an entry in my seemingly neglected cyberspace of a blog.

It's the eve of my 21st birthday and for the first time in weeks, I have decided to write down all my musings that have been on my mind for a couple of months now.

It has been just a little over a month when I defended my thesis; yes, my thesis that has plagued this blog for almost a year! Before my thesis term happened, I vowed to focus, focus, and focus! Having no more than three academic units that term when thesis started, I certainly had no other responsibilities, save for my beloved Green Media Group (GMG). Since then, I seem to have lost connection to the outside world. It's not like I lost my social life totally (because I admit I lost half of it) or that I suddenly decided to become a hermit or hide under a rock; it's more like living life entirely and solely for the completion of thesis. For seemingly endless months, thesis had been my life.

I won't delve on thesis any more since, like I said, this blog is full of it. If you track back until around say, September 2010 in Retrospective Perspective (archives), and you'll find the answers to all your questions. Haha!

Anyway, that part of my life is over and done, but the heartache lives on, insiiiide. TOTALLY KIDDING. (If you're someone I really get along with, admit it, you sang that part. Haha.) Seriously, now that it's over and done, I have been thinking about a lot of things: from the past, all those mistakes and learning from them; the present, how thankful or spiteful I have become toward a lot of things; and the future, what lies ahead as I linger in this uncertain present.

This isn't exactly "quarter life crisis" like what a few of my peers say that they're currently experiencing or recently have undergone. For one, I see no crisis in my situation; and two, let me save us the argument by saying that the average lifespan of a human being is about 80 years old, so I can definitely say that at 20, this is quarter life. Haha!

I have done way too many things in only two decades. Presenting, my life summary so far.

For the earlier part of my life, I may have only acted according to somebody else's will (say, my parents) because they say it's what's right or it's for the best. Also during my childhood, I probably just thought, acted, and spoke the way that society and culture expected me to. Looking back on that part of my childhood, I have no regrets. I was just a kid after all. I can even say that I have had a great childhood. You know, nothing tragic like homes catching fire or serious illnesses; nothing extraordinary like winning the lottery as well. I couldn't have asked for anything more when I was born into a loving home with a dad and mom who love each other unwaveringly to create a nurturing environment, and a brother who I share a love-hate relationship with; you know how siblings are.

When I finally learned to think, act, and speak out of my own volition, I also began to realize how complex the seemingly simple things have become. Maybe they were complicated to start with and I was just too young to realize it; or that they have always been pretty easy and I have grown to be the eccentric over-thinking being that I am. Either way, I have no regrets. I have done stupid things that cost me and some others their valuable time, effort, and energy; something I'm not very proud of, but we all have those skeletons in our closets, don't we? Yet I make sure to never let it surface. I have become a beacon of negativity during a short phase of my adolescent life. That's one thing I would prefer to be erased from my memory, but that would mean I won't learn from it.

I can proudly say that I am not that person anymore. Well, at least when it came to perspectives about life in general. Dad constantly reminds my brother and I about, beyond physics, how the law of attraction (The Secret by Rhonda Byrne) will keep us motivated about anything we set our minds to; and mom makes sure we don't just hear dad's words of wisdom but actually listen to it and live it.

The new chapter of my life when I started studying at the university back in 2007 was a turning point for most of what and how I am now. College changed me from that wallflower back in high school. 2008 didn't make much positive difference, though, making a big leap from awesome to plain ohmygod-why-is-this- happening. Gladly, 2009 was the year of recovery and recuperation, the year of steady! Come 2010, my college batch mates started graduating and gettin jobs, while I, completing my course curriculum requirements stayed at university and making good use of my spare time being immersed and trying to be useful to GMG. Thesis was set to commence that year as well. The rest is history, let's leave it at that. Haha, you know it when you know about it and my lips stay sealed; I'd love to give my emotions a break! Haha.

As for 2011... Brace yourself for the cliche. It is a rollercoaster ride.

Inexplicable level of stress. Too much unnecessary drama. Bewildering spontaneity. That and everything else! I'd be exaggerating but it's safe to say that everything that can happen to me to make my life interesting has probably happened already.

And most recently, my forthcoming graduation from the university, finally. October 15, 2011, mark it.

Highest of highs and lowest of lows, thirteen terms of going to and from both ends of the emotional spectrum is the best four years and three months of my life. For everything, regardless of anything, I am and will forever be grateful! Thank you, Lord.

Today, I say good bye and thank you for the irreplace much more and memorable twenty years! And cheers to you for being a proactive part of my life. Cheers to creating a lot more of those in the years to come!

See you around in this voyage to greatness!

Emancipation

For the past months, I have not veered away from the topic of thesis in most of my blog entries. I'm more thankful that you stuck around for this long than I am sorry that this is getting sickening for you. After all, I don't have a particular theme for my blog, but me. Haha, pardon the narcissism if that's how you see it because not once have I intended for this to be in such way; just my online memory box. Anyway, back to the issue.

I hope and pray that THIS shall be the last of my thesis-related blogging saga, because today, my thesismates and I are finally emancipated from all requirements of our degree program's curriculum.

In behalf of Meryl and David of Working Lunch Productions, *insert magical chimes SFX* behold, all 55 pages of nine laborious yet fulfilling months of thesis goodness, hard-bound for the University Archives!

Sure, graduation is a month and a half away but I can't dwindle into idleness, right? Thus, September 1 marks the onset of an uncertain future.

Today's Specialty: Grilled Steak

We carnivores have our own preferences when it comes to how we want our steaks to be grilled: rare, medium rare, medium, or well done. Before that, though, we make sure we have the cut that is just right: filet, ribeye, strip, T-bone/porterhouse, or sirloin.

Today, 16 different cuts of steak (me included) were grilled. No matter how hard each steak cut wished to be grilled rare, the cooks wanted them all medium to well done. It's not exactly a bad thing for all of the steak cuts; how we were grilled actually helped to get the flavor out, almost to the point of charring. The bottom line is that each steak is cooked enough, ready for the October celebration!

Below: (1) Steaks aka thesis groups (2) condiments, garnish, flavoring aka thesis project (3) party time! [Wow, incoherent images in one collage. Tsk. I need more than my REM sleep tonight.]

Pardon the metaphor, it's a metaphor of the hungry! Haha.

My group's defense wasn't exactly exemplar or stellar but we couldn't be more satisfied about how everything fell into place, even if some needed a bit of adjusting. October graduation, here I come! :)

End Credits

I've been all about end credits today, more specifically, about thesis. My bestfriend-sister-thesismate and I finally got through most of the hurdles in this thesis-making marathon! Even our thesis mentor said we're 90% done, so YAY! No other way to express this overwhelming happiness, but YAY!

Non-thesis news: RED UNDERWEAR MYSTERY NO MORE!!!

One of my favorite cartoons, Shaun the Sheep, has this mysteriously funny ending credits. I've been searching for a YouTube clip of it for over an hour now and I dunno if it's just that I can't find the right keywords or that a clip of it isn't available anywhere. I'm sorry, I'll just have to describe it to you:

I have always wondered why, at the end credits of the show, the sheep are staring at the red underwear then at you then back at the underwear, and then at you, as the text scrolls up on the left side. Well, as much as I found it difficult to find a video, it was too easy to find a forum that discussed it. (Yes, it is that intriguing that people talk about it online. Haha! Oh and yes, there's a Shaun the Sheep forum!)

Anyway, my ultimate question has been answered, finally! Now I know! Hahaha!

That's interesting ending credits for you! ;)

Knowing that we're 10% away from when my life really begins, I can allow myself a good rest as I count sheep (woohoo pun intended) tonight!

A Few More Hops

I smell it. I hear it. I feel it. I see it.

A hop away and I can finally taste it! No, not the carrot, silly. Haha.

The taste of sweet success that awaits at the end of this unbelievably long, tedious, and laborious tunnel of hard work and anvils and anvils of sacrifice that rested for months too long upon my shoulders. (Whoo, what a mouthful. Of carrots, haha JK.)

I dreamed with my eyes wide open. I took a leap of faith. I ran blindfolded. I slept with my mind fully awake.

A few more hops and this bunny will get the prized carrot she has yearned for so long.

One last hurdle and my life, in the real, big, bad world, begins.

Career High

Academic Year 2009-2010, Second Term, was when I hit the lowest GPA. I was really lazy then; I lacked the motivation and I got into a lot of things that interested me more than school did. That term was really fun but the GPA I got wasn't fun at all! After that, I vowed: NEVER AGAIN!

This term, I hit career high. It's Dean's List-worthy, after all. I was a Dean's Lister for only two terms in my frosh year. That's it. Everything had been pretty much a struggle after that, what with majors and all. *sigh* Given that I only have thesis and one major class for this term, it's only right that I get the grade I have wanted for a long time: DL-worthy with a GPA of above 3.0. But wait, there's more! Haha. Had I enrolled 12 units this term, I would definitely qualify for the Dean's List! First Honors, at that: 3.667. WHAT UP? However, had I enrolled 12 unites this term, I might have not reached that high a grade. Haha. But I'm still very grateful that all sleepless nights and stressful mornings have finally paid off.

Here's to a merry, merry, merry Christmas vacation! CHEERS!

Tomorrow, I shall formally close this term and fly to my hometown! Time to leave school behind and enjoy my limited time with family and friends back home! CHRISTMAS BREAK CHALLENGE: All my bags are packed and I'm ready to go. I decided to leave my laptop and planner here in Manila. Davao time will be school- and work-free!

Happy holidays!

December Kicks Off Nicely

What a feat. Our thesis proposal paper is done.

Well, the format's still on the works as of tonight but uh, I think we're good to go. I shall now informally part ways with sleepless nights and zombie waking hours. Hello, bed, pillow, and blanket!

To celebrate this joyous day (HAHA), it ended with a chill bonding experience with my GMG babies. My self-claimed little sister, Arlene, Nikkai to me, turned 19 last Saturday. Her birthday treat was loud, tiring, and tipsy. It was awesome. I missed that feeling.

So, hello, hello, baby December. Keep all the good things coming!

Here's a webcam snapshot of Meryl and I on a quick breather from all thirty pages of words, words, words, and more words. Apt isn't it? Camcorder template, video thesis? Haha, la la la.

Dad Lives the Dream

Three weeks ago, my family and I went to Nuvali in Sta. Rosa, Laguna for my dad's training for his first 42-kilometer run. After sixteen weeks of training, proper diet, and rigid self-discipline, I think Dad was more than ready for The Bull Runner Dream Marathon. Today, he lived that dream!

Starting at an ungodly hour of 2:00 AM... (sorry, bad lighting!)
...Dad finished all 42 kilometers in 5 hours and 18 minutes! (See that victorious man cross the pink ribbon!) I do think, though, that his mini support system worked wonders. Haha! See photos below.
Nice touch with the art materials for cheering! Anyway, my dad's name is not Jack. We call him such in reference to Jack Bauer of that awesome TV series, 24. Haha. Okay, TMI.
Imagine how many people in this world can complete a full marathon. Need I present statistics? Hah! I'm so proud of my dad!

More photos:Dad poses again at the photo wall, now with The Bull Runner Dream Marathon organizer, The Bull Runner herself, Jaymie Pizarro! Congrats, TBR, for a very successful event! Next year again? :)
And here is Dad with Coach Jim Lafferty. Coach Jim's techniques are way beyond awesome! I've tried incorporating them into my daily timetable, but school, among others, gets in the way. Soon, soon.
Matadors greet the The Bull Runner Dream Marathoners with a medal upon crossing the finish line. Bull Runner, matadors... Hah! Very clever. ;)
Daddy and the (very) few, the loud, and the proud Team Running Jack! Hahaha! We adjusted body clocks, meal times, mindsets. We stood strong amidst millions of yawns at dawn; amidst the heat on that sunny day... Anything for Dad!
(L-R) Drew Arellano, Iya Villania, me, my brother Gabe. (Like, duh, did I really have to have that caption? Hahahaha.)
Me, TBR and TBR Jr. :) To be treasured! Haha! My blog is graced by The Bull Runner's presence. *DANCE* Hahaha.

Since I am yet to run 42K, here's a manipulated photo of the photo wall from today. Haha!
And soon (say, a year? Haha), I will run my own 42K! After I'm done with all the school requirements I'm expected to finish to get that diploma, I can focus my time on training so I can live my dream marathon, too. Perhaps in a year or two? ;)

A Day of Sorts

MOST AWESOME FAMILY BONDING WEEKEND YET!

We all woke up at the ungodly hour of 3AM because we headed to Nuvali in Laguna for the Bull Session 3. No, I didn't participate in it (wish I did, though), but Daddy did! And yes, the whole family was there to support. Haha. :)
The Bull Runner, Jaymie Pizarro, giving out instructions on groupings.

If I'm not mistaken, that's The Bull Runner's group doing a 5 minute run, 1 minute walk.
I think 5:27 AM is pretty late starting time for a long run. By long, I mean marathon long. It'll be too hot by the time runners cross the finish line. Then again, that's just my musing.
Mom, brother, and I ran our own route. I disappointed myself with my performance today. My mind, lungs, and legs weren't in harmony. I lack practice! I've been a bum for three weeks now. But can you really blame me for bumming and pigging out after the finals week of my third term for junior year? Haha.
Hi-ho, hi-ho! Laborers on their way to work on a bright Sunday morning. Two more and they'd pass up as the Seven Dwarfs. Heehee.
With these signs, Nuvali seems like a very friendly place. I like it there!

While we were running back to Solenad, we decided to quit so we could take in the scenic surroundings. They may be man-made but it's almost unnatural to not be awed.
So yes, we had to stop for photo-op. Haha! :P
And so after we cleaned up, we fed millions of Koi fishes! They're gross when they crowd and go crazy over tiny fish food pellets. It's fun, none the less. :D
The taxi boat ride was just too tempting to let it pass up. Haha, such dorks. Besides, Daddy was still running then. Haha, excuses!
Speaking of Daddy, spot Dad run! In case you can't zoom in, he's making a funny pretend-binoculars gesture with his hands against his eyes; and I wonder why I get too goofy at times. Haha!
Yay, fun boat ride! Dorks 101.
I am not ashamed to say why this photo looks pathetic: I'm such a chicken for not going up to Jaymie Pizarro (The Bull Runner). All I wanted was to take a photo with her but I don't know what got to me. Hey, don't judge me for being pathetic, okay. We have our days. Haha.
So... Here's Daddy, with really bad tan lines. No, it's brown lines. It doesn't show how burnt his arms and legs were, though. Anyway, it got too hot that morning. Point is, it's a summer morning. I hope the TBR Dream Marathon starts earlier so each first time marathoner can finish the run sans injury and heatstroke! Haha. I'm excited for my dad! Someday, I will run my first marathon. Someday!

We were exhausted! It wasn't from running, I'm sure about that. Say, the Koi fish feeding? Or the boat ride? Oh, it's the heat! We were too tired that after an Italianni's lunch, we weren't so interested in shopping at Paseo. There wasn't much to see anyway. Too lazy to have taken photos on this part of the day as well. We all collapsed onto our beds and woke up hours later. After hearing mass, hello, Selecta Ice Cream Land!
Selecta Ice Cream Feast at the South Parking of the SM Mall of Asia! For only P50, you get a free ice cream on a cone, and once inside, line up all you want and get high on unlimited ice cream! Well, it got limited when they ran out. Haha. I had a cone and three cups. Ow, my tummy. I know.
The ride wasn't THAT great. It wasn't too shabby, too. But I. Was. In. A major screamfest! HAHAHA. I blame my brother for pushing me to experience "Underworld" on the X-Rider. Haha. The lady at the counter sheepishly nodded when I asked if my screams were too loud. Dammit. Hahaha.

I look forward to more days like this. It's hella tiring but it's great to get to spend time with folks despite my unfair summer schedule. :)

Back From Hiatus

Such an eventful Friday! (Okay, fine, fine, delayed post. Hahaha.)

"Ladies and gentlemen, please, walk this way!" Mr. Carlos Celdran, thank you, I had an awesome walking tour! Manila never looked so different until you made us see beyond aesthetics. :)
On a kalesa with Meryl, Kay, and Paula! Thanks manong kalesa driver for this photo!
Later that Friday, Royale: Rule the Night at Gasthof, A-Venue, a party for the benefit of Project: Brave Kids. I rarely go to parties but my friends, Lych and Reg (and their group for their event class) organized it. Congrats!

(Okay, so they're not in the photo. Hahaha. Sorry, the ones with them aren't up yet!) Here's Pam, Ate Clarence, Kuya Jojo, AJ, and Mommy Ria! Some heart-to-heart with Ate Clarence made a lot of things make a lot of sense! :)
And then my Saturday and Sunday were very uneventful. Home, grocery shopping, church, dine out. But it was awesome, nonetheless.

I didn't mind three things for three days:

1. SCHOOL - Yes, I know it's almost finals week but I think I can manage to take a break. Besides, my classes this term don't require a lot of reading, reviewing, studying, and the like. Most of them (if not all, hmm) are method- or process- application classes. Of course, having Monday as a no-class-day is always a plus! :)
   
2. WORK - I know I'm not really "employed" but GMG, more than an extra-curricular school activity, is almost my life. Well, my lifestyle is dictated by it sometimes. I haven't been very MIA (missing in action) because I'm like glued to my phone, still. I think I really, really deserve a break from all the production services request. After all, I have academic, family, and social life to lookout for as well.
   
3. CYBERSPACE - My mom always told me that I'm an internet monster. Or a computer monster. Something like that. I look like a zombie because I stay up until the wee hours of dawn, just hooked up to the internet, eyes glues to the monitor, fingers typing away to infinity. And beyond! (Haha, Buzz Lightyear in the house?) I'm glad to see only 77 email messages for a span of three days, as opposed to my more estimated 50+ email messages per 24 hours.

Now that I'm back from my so-so but relaxing weekend, I expect my world to be the way it was three days ago: noisy and erratic despite the awesome, cheap thrills. I don't expect the stress to be murderous anymore. I think I owned the weekend.

Taking The Wheel

Today wasn't my usual class-chill-stat-hangout-MIA-chill Thursday.

I drew this on my best friend Joh's nape, see? CUTIE! I think I wanna be a tattoo artist if worse comes to worst. Bahahaha!

I took the wheel tonight and boy did I drive! (Haha, what?) The Green Media Group had its last general assembly for this school year and it was awesome. Hehe. Well, generally, maybe not really that awesome, but it was to me! It was the first time that I presided a general assembly. It was nothing much, really. It's just like talking in front of a class, telling them about your plans and all other agenda. It was cool.

Two weeks ago, the Executive Board for the next academic year was announced. Tonight, more brave souls were summoned to the call of leadership and responsibility: the Pool Heads for GMG's six unique pools.

[L-R] Incoming pool heads for an awesome year ahead: Frank (Hosting), Hannah (Creatives), Raj (Production Design), Celine (Coverage), Robin (Scriptwriting), and Joan (Audio-Visual Production).

Outgoing (and proxy) pool heads and incoming pool heads!

Outgoing pool heads, incoming pool heads, plus the executive board! We are gonna have an awesome year, loves! ♥

Going through a transition phase yet again, and this time, I really should take the wheel. Note to self: In everything that you do, DFTBA! (Don't forget to be awesome!)

Personal Best

My personal best was 50 minutes for 5K, and that's the farthest I can run. More than that, I think I'd die midway. Haha. With enough training I think I can go for a 10K on the Mizuno Run on Aprill 11. But! Before anything else, I'm still holding my head high and proud because I beat my 50 minutes this morning in Ready, Get Sweat, Go!, the Pocari Sweat Fun Run. This morning, I ran for only 43 minutes for 5K! Woo!

It is Otsuka's first time to organize a fun run, I think, and I have to give it to them for having 1,800 registered runners. That's 300 people more than expected! ;) But I hate how the water stations weren't very functional. They're placed in strategic places but I know that they weren't strategic enough when I started coughing because my throat was already extremely dry!

Anyway, less rant, more photos!

HAHA. This photo, FTW. Sorry, I'm just so overwhelmed. I wasted a month without training and yet I beat my personal best!
Mom beat her personal best, too, with 38 minutes! Woot!
My brother, Gabe, was supposed to run 10K, but he has a basketball game in the mid-morning. No, he didn't run 3K. He ran 5K, we were just being goofy. Hahaha.
Look who I met up with at the starting and finish line? David! Hahaha! Great job on the 22 minutes, partner!
Beads of sweat. Let's go, thesis! (More beads of sweat there. Haha!) Missing Meryl. Sis, run with us soon, ah? :>

After today, I have set a new goal: RUN MY FIRST 10K! It comes with a condition, though. I'll only run a distance of 10K once I get a 30-minute 5K run. Woo!